Ready, Reset, Go! (2006-2008)

First, I want to apologize for being an unthinking jerk.

Yeah, I know that's frequent enough that I could just make such apologies a running ticker here like on cable news.

But, instead of describing precisely what I meant to say in a post, I made a sweeping comment about some folks who didn't deserve that treatment. And while I knew what I was trying to aim for... admiration, I would think... well, to an outside reader, my lazy choice of words reads as an insult. It wasn't intended, but that doesn't matter when it stings. I apologize, guys.



Second, I think the whole Half-Nekkid Thursday thing is a fun concept.

But, unlike Brettcajun or Kelly Stern, who seem to have camera crews following them around when their shirts come off (and this is a very good thing!), I've noticed a low-level struggle inside myself to share such pictures of me. This is only being mildly overcome in the past three months or so.

There is a reason for this reticence . It's actually something I will write about next week, since in my third counseling session (just yesterday), I suddenly found myself tackling this very issue.

The short version (for those that have never had a problem with self-confidence):

Starting with my weight issues in elementary school, I have always viewed myself as somehow a lesser person in terms of physical appearance - somehow unlikable, thought the reasons I felt this was true would change over time.

Whether this was an actual truth in my life, I viewed myself this way for most of my life.

Any time I briefly thought I was maybe "at least a little ok looking" I immediately realized I was only fooling himself if I thought people could desire or even like me. And that anyone who actually DID desire or like me... well, I couldn't explain it but it couldn't possibly be for real. No matter what people would tell me, I could never feel it to be true.

Because I was undesirable, by definition. It was an axiom.

3. an established rule or principle or a self-evident truth

I didn't say it was logical or rational. But it was - until very VERY recently - precisely how I viewed myself without question.

And you can imagine how that worked for me in the gay world, where (grossly generalizing) physical image is often viewed as the only important thing.

So these past few months have been interesting - maybe even a little revolutionary - for me. Whether it's through meeting new people, emerging from the ruins of last year, exercising more, losing some weight I've put on over the past few years, or whatever - I'm starting to feel that I can, in my heart of hearts, accept that the axiom is false.

(Hmmm... this isn't much of a "short version". Quoi de neuf?)

I noticed this subtle change when I saw a shot of myself from this weekends gay blogger meetup in NYC. Mark (at Zeitzeuge), in his massive collection of images from this weekend, caught a picture of me that made me pause. Mainly cuz my first reaction was: "who's that??" And then I realized it was me. And that it wasn't so bad.

And I noted a comparison from a year ago, which I present as a "Yesterday and Today" type of half-nekkid Thursday.

Here's a picture (on the left) of me with Darin back in March 2006. I did not like it at all. And on the right is this past weekend in NYC. There's at least some improvement that I hadn't fully appreciated.





















While I have a boat-load to work on, some of the changes in my life are beginning to have an effect - at least to my eyes, which are normally so severely self-judgmental.

I by no means have a sudden high-falutin' view of myself. But I definitely feel like I can begin to assert, in many more ways than just the physical and superficial, that I am worth being liked and desired and loved. I am not a "lesser person".

I am just as good as any other ditzy queen out there.

And I can even become better.

And that makes me feel waves of optimism.

Which is new for me.

Just a toss-off for today. Been pumping out all that weekend booze with extra exercise.

Heh heh... I don't remember these as a kid.
(Originally from this site)



Did you know we just passed the 30th anniversary of the release of Star Wars?

That stuff used to mean a lot to me. Still does a bit. But not so much.
...

A few quick relevant flicks to pass some time.

First, one just to show how a simple editing job (no computer enhancements or even added sounds) can still make me chuckle.

(What a dick!)



But then, of course, there's Robot Chicken. And those boys KNOW their Star Wars!

(That's... very unlikely)

(BTW, that's Mark Hamill - he does tons of Robot Chicken)


(I love you, too)



And the George Lucas Approved "Star Wars: Robot Chicken" (Airing on Adult Swim, June 17th). THIS I'm looking forward to...



And finally, if you can spare 13 minutes and low-budget 1970s movie making... The classic sci-fi spoof "Hardware Wars"
(I can't understand you. Are you talking to me?):

Yah... you think that's a long drawn-out trailer spoof? Low production values?
Well take a look at this. It's the real thing from 1977:



ZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz

Cripes! And people got excited by this? Man were we lame in the 70s or what?

I met quite a few new folks this weekend in New York. As he has many times, Rey put up with me at his place. Of course, getting peed on a few times by his new puppy made the experience extra-special. I *was* warned. Regardless, this is why I shall remain a cat-person.

A few Things I Learned (just a sampling off the top of my head):

• Even the New York gay bloggers are guys just like the rest of us.

• Sepia makes everything look more... respectable. (Embiggenable picture here)

• Joe (JMG) is an endless fount of stories. I mean for almost any subject, he has a story. The guy should write a book. (I know he wrote some stories, but he could write many. Sometimes the same story with different endings.)

• Farmboyz is/are impressive to watch. I need to learn their ways. :) [EDIT: I really apologize for the term I had originally used here. I hadn't meant it in a hurtful way at all. I wasn't thinking.]
  

• I was not sufficiently slutty. I don't know why. But it was dumb. When will I learn? (See below for more on that)

• Texan accents on an attractive man - I know there's like a bunch of different accents, I'm talking about the Ennis del Mar one - make me pop wood. Like I had to fight it down. You know who you are.

Oh yeah! It was too funny actually meeting the guy who lolgay'd me. At the Eagle, Farmboyz said "this is Manhattan Offender." Well he's the guy that runs Lolgay. So, I screamed to Mr. Townsend:

"You lolgay'd me!"
"oh are you Atari"
"yeah"
(finger to lips with a look of feigned embarrassment) "well you know I found that picture by looking up 'gay' and 'hot'. "

While clearly untrue - See! That picture is nowhere there - it didn't matter. I thought it was fun!

Overall, I had a great time. I had family issues overlapping this, but I managed to do both family and social tasks reasonably well. Reasonably.


...

OK - self analysis mode... and no, I am not moaning or sad. I am recounting an observation I made and (somewhere deep inside) thinking what needs changing.

So I had a fun time Sunday night at the Eagle with a few of the blogger dudes.

Had some great conversations.

And yet at the end, I found myself in a familiar situation (especially familiar at that bar).

Somewhere in this whole mix of people, I had the sneaking suspicion that I should be getting laid. But I didn't. OK, actually that's not the situation I mean. And besides, I'm well aware that's my own fault.

Anyway, most of these guys had been drinking since the afternoon. So by 2am, if I recall correctly, slowly but surely they were all taking off.

And then I was on my own again.

Drunk too, which plays a role... but still.

And suddenly I found myself in a corner on the roof. With no connections. Where I was once feeling in-the-loop, chatting, laughing, dishing, occasionally getting felt up, I was suddenly on the outside again - feeling out of place, unattractive and forgotten.

It was as if time had shifted and where I was once part of the flow of people, I was now a rock in the stream - the water of gay-men-hooking-up streaming around and past the uninteresting rock that was me.

I pulled a Hiro: I was in the middle of interesting times, then I squinted real hard, and I was magically off to the side - out of sight and out of mind.

This is all fueled by alcohol, I'm sure. But it was almost amazing to watch - half from the inside and half as an observer watching myself and the whole scene.

People are strange when you're a stranger.

It just reinforces my own history at that bar. I have a great time when I'm there with people. I have an awful time when I'm there alone.

So, being that I was liquored and alone, I exercised my growing ability to know when it is time to go and... I left.

At least I'm learning something.

End of analysis. Well, I guess it wasn't analysis. Just observation. I'll analyze later.

...

Anyways, I had a great time meeting these guys (the list of many of them is here).

I wish I had had more time, actually, but therein is a request for time management skills.

Frankly, I'd rather learn money management first.

And then the management of drinking vs. getting laid.

But I digress.

Whenever I write something that is meant to analyze a piece of my life (say, my last post), it comes off sounding like I'm sad and moaning.


It probably can't be helped, unless I work on my writing Voice when I go down that road.

I need to consider that when doing any type of introspection in writing. Especially when dealing with upsetting moments - past and present - it's impossible to not have some of the frustrations and sadness sound fresh.

But, just so you know, while there have been some difficult, stressful, and emotionally upsetting moments recently, I'm neither sad nor moaning at this time.

Oh sure, back a few months ago - and on and off for a year after the break-up, I was a wreck. I think that was kinda obvious.

But not right now. Life won't always be so hot, but for now I'm semi-coasting.

Just realize that from the very first day I started writing a blog (the old one), I began to consciously use some blog posts to explore pieces of my life. Not with any consistency, of course. Usually just when the topic seems pertinent or if my mind went there.

And yes, often, when it's about current stuff, I am likely to be frustrated or sad at that very moment.

But other times I'm just noticing a repetitive problem in my life, realizing it is there, and exploring the nature of it.

I can see how it is difficult to tell the difference. In writing, you can't see if I have tears in my eyes and a wine glass by my side, or if my brow is simply furrowed in thought.

The goal of that exploration is, at it's heart, to find ways of change, forge new paths, to simply think to turn left when I would habitually turn right. That sort of thing.

I honestly never did this consciously before this past year or so. It's been messy and clumsy, but it has moved me in a net positive direction.

Net positive = more positive than negative. "3 steps forward, 2 steps back" It's still 1 step forward. Progress. Being mad at or ignoring the backsteps is pointless.

I am now thinking about these steps - backwards and forwards - where, in the past, they simply would "happen" because I was so used to reacting in certain ways.

And the simple reason for this contemplation is it offers one way of making the next attempt "3 steps forward, and one step back". More better progress.

And the ultimate goal?

Just something a bit more joyful than what came before.

Like this:


Now that's Happy!

Single so little

I have no clue how to date and how not to date.

Seriously, just a complete klutz.

I really have about 0% experience in navigating the "single life".

There are many reasons for this, but here's one that's pretty relevant:

• I have been an active gay man for 16 years. But only 3.5 of them have been with me "on the market"
  
• Of my 16 gay years, I have been in relationships for 11 of them (the first for 1 year, the second for 10).
  
• Out of the 5 single years, 1.5 years were spent being reclusive for one reason or another.
  
• The remaining 3.5 years are the ones where I should have been honing the craft of "dating" or whatever you want to call it.

The first "on the market" year was before relationship #1. During this period I was shy and insecure and clueless. I did meet guys and sometimes hooking-up happened - never more than once with any person. I never took it beyond that. Either I was picky or insecure or whatever, but there was always a reason.

Year 1 of being on the market: didn't learn shit.

The second year was between relationships #1 and #2. During this period I was still shy and insecure, though a little less clueless. Second verse, same as the first. Hook-up, exchange numbers, don't want to call back. (Don't look at me that way - I can tell you the practice of 'not calling' was usually mutual.)

Year 2 of being on the market: still didn't learn shit.

And don't think that me ending up with any long-term relationships is somehow proof that I secretly learned something. I can tell you my incompetence in navigating the single life has remained steadfastly monumental.

And now I'm here.

The last 1.5 years of being on the market (i.e., now): still really haven't learned shit.

Yes, I've gained some experience and confidence in a few aspects of my life - slowly and awkwardly, but unquestionably.

However, I realize that when it comes to knowing the right way to negotiate relationships - keeping them platonic, or keeping them purely physical, or maybe moving things to the next level - I am the same uncoordinated bozo that I was in those other two years.

Crazy Boat

But there is one difference. I am really thinking about it now.

The other two "available" years I was just flailing around, a crazy-car motorboat going haywire with me cowering in the back thinking "WTF?".

Even up until February this year, it was more of the same - mainly due to shock and post-traumatic stress disorder, I suppose.

But the past few months... I seem to have crawled up to the front of the boat and started to twiddle the controls and spin the wheel of this boat I'm floating.

In so doing, I have banged up the hull on rocks and whacked a few other unsuspecting boaters - some pretty badly.

Oh, I wave my hands apologetically saying, "I'm so sorry, I'm still trying to make this thing go right."
And they're correctly yelling, "dude, you've been in that thing for 16 years."
And I'm replying, "well, yeah, but I only started driving it a few months ago."
And they're going "man, you're a real mess," and zipping away to look for more experienced motorboaters.

I really, honestly, tried digging around for instructions somewhere here.
But then I found a pamphlet containing just one sentence:

This product does not come with an instruction manual.

Crap.

Did everyone else out there know about this???

To assist in improving design online, a journalism review group did a study of how people's eyes lingered over certain areas of pages. They call it "eyetracking".

Makes a plot - right on the webpage or image - of where people are looking.

Useful information, but certainly dry to all but layout mavens.

Until the end.

From the original article:

This image of George Brett was part of a larger page with his biographical information. All users tested looked the image, but there was a distinct difference in focus between men and women.

Weeeeelllll... it's a subtle difference, but probably outside the margin of error, so I buy it.

Hmmmm.... the study says guys liked to look at crotches of animals as well.

Men are freaks.

(hat-tip to Mark Simpson, who apparently is the originator of the term "Sporno")

So, exactly why should this NOT become law?

From Gallup:

A substantial majority of the American public favors the expansion of federal hate crime legislation to include crimes against people based on their gender, sexual orientation, and gender identity....

(hat tip: Americablog)

There is not one group - NOT ONE - that is significantly against this legislation. The least supportive are "Conservatives" and they are still reasonably strong.

But it's going to get vetoed.

Why?

And will Congress do anything about it?

If not, why not?

Oh frak, I've been LOLGay'd!

Ugh...

I'd like to think I'm looking a little better than that these days. A little, anyways.

I blame Dan for releasing that photo to the public (it's from my trip with Dan, Ray, and Kevin in Florida around February 2005). So, Dan, please watch it with some of those other pics! :P

I didn't even know what LOLGay was (it's a spin-off of LOLCats).

But now, I'm kinda hooked.

.
(Note: Clarifications below)

Watching one of my new favorite shows, Heroes, with friends at their new house: A blast.

Realizing far too late that drinks would not be accompanied by eats: More difficult.

Feeling the effects of alcohol on an empty stomach: This time, not as bad as you might expect.

Having some of the group choose to subsequently watch Saw III while I was feeling twistily inebriated: Disturbing and mildly panic-inducing.

Having the group actually listen to two of us who said we'd leave the room if they didn't turn it off: Refreshing.

Being amazingly entranced by a guy sitting next to me(friend of my friends and fellow Saw-hater), which is something I haven’t felt in years and years: Reinvigorating.

Him looking like a young Jeremy Irons in his prime, deep gravelly voice, being a loose-cannon who is clearly a live-wire when he gets piss-drunk and yet speaks French, Spanish, Italian, AND German fluently, actually getting me to speak my little-remembered French with him (NO ONE has gotten me to do that in years), having the same opinion as me about films like Saw III (snuff porn, nothing more), requesting that we watch proper porn instead (we didn’t), and overall being one hot and tight SOB who exudes pheromones of some sort, I'm sure of it: Fantastically exciting.

(Note: He was neither shirtless nor had a horse. What's the deal with the horse here, anyway?)

Him being in a 7 year relationship with his partner, who is also in the room: Less exciting.

Me momentarily thinking "So? I was in a 10 year relationship and none of John's friends gave a shit while I was getting fucked over royally. Why should *I* give a shit about anyone else?": Jarring but momentarily liberating.

Me tossing that line of thinking aside: Grounding but strangely disappointing.

Waking up the next morning realizing my infatuation evaporated with the alcohol: Mildly surprising but personally edifying. (That is, I can still float on wings of desire but can land on my feet if I have to jump off)

Me holding out hope, regardless, that they might be into a 3-way: Delusional.


Clarification: To be clear, I wasn't in love with him, just somewhat in lust - though in a less-than-usual was for me. Also, Canuck, understand that the scumbag who is now living with John, who dumped *me* after 10 years, is seriously dead meat if I ever meet him. So, I'd think it unlikely I could knowingly attempt to steal a man away from someone he loves, even if that were possible. A 3-way, on the other hand...

Wow - it's like someone was stoned while working in Powerpoint.
Stream-of-consciousness meets charting skills.

The absolute best line (near the end):

The difference is 'Why You Drink'

The charts were inspired by this amazing (in my opinion) blog.

As an example of complex issues presented in simplicity, I am pasting a recent post of hers here.

How to get two straight guys from this...




To this...



...and beyond?


Apparently a six pack of beer (per guy).

I should re-consider my ban on lusting after straight guys. I mean, talk about a cheap date!

Go see the whole research article - it's some funny shit.

Oh yeah, and there's a nice butt shot near the end.


... you're welcome.

OMG!

Has anyone ever seen this before? I have no idea where this is... I can't even tell if it's just on a computer or a neon sign.

Actually, the funniest thing is the video is classified under "How-To & DIY" LOL!



Anyways, have a good weekend!

I'm just tossing this off for the moment. I have a lot of crap to work on for a while...

Just a reminder that all for all those gay guys out there that will never consider watching Science Fiction (or even just speculative fiction)that... well, you really should.

Some mild eye-candy from the two current king shows (in my mind) of the serialized speculative fiction realms: Battlestar Galactica and Heroes.

Michael Trucco (left, who is playing a much larger role these days) and Callum Keith Rennie (right, the only Cylon I've ever had a massive crush on. He's one of those guys in my serious "type" zone. Seriously, I'd dump all the other guys here for a night in the sack with him!)




But, of course, deep in my heart my prime lust on that show will always be Jamie Bamber. (If I recall correctly, though, Darin finds him ugly. Well, we can't all have good taste.)



(hat-tip to Kevin for directing me to this photo)

I would most definitely add Tahmoh Penikett here, but I can't find a good photo of him - can anyone help me with that? Same goes for Kieth - no shirtless photos or nothin... but I had to include him, cause I like him so much.

Then there's Heroes.

Now, I have to say I'm kinda into the head slicing, world domination obsessed baddie, Sylar (Zachary Quinto).






I think I was especially intrigued after seeing this clip from some show I'd never heard of (which is common with me). Just wait till the end of the clip.



However, in this show, I think I'm most into the brothers Petrelli. Preferably both. Together. With me.

The younger Peter (Milo Ventimiglia)



...and the older (and IMO, hotter!) Nathan (Adrian Pasdar). No, not that Milo isn't hot - he's amazing. Just that Adrian is another guy in my perfect "type".


Yeah, I'm smiling, too. Now lose the jammies.


So... questions:

• Have I missed someone (in Sci-fi/fantasy on TV)? Aside from Ben Browder, natch. I mean, there's like a whole web industry of drooling guys tracking his every move on TV. And with good reason.
  
• Does anyone have BETTER pictures of these guys? Jamie is well represented, of course. But some - I'm thinking of Adrian and Keith (ed. Do I call him Callum or Keith?)- well... I mean, there's gotta be something racier out there. You guys scour the web, right? Any clues?

(Note: I actually was aware that by even mentioning a company name, and certainly running it's ads for it, I'm only perpetuating the success of something which I seem to be criticizing. Oh well. I'm not criticizing the company at all - I didn't even really know what they do until I looked it up. I'm just wanking on about an ad. I can live with the upsetting paradox I've created.)

ooof. Somewhat yukky weekend. Definitely freaky Monday.

So instead of talking about any of that, I have to get something else off my chest. In fact I'm dedicating many words to this just so I don't have to talk about anything else.

It's something more important than a job on suddenly shaky ground, wanting to firmly move forward and not being sure it will happen, or not getting laid this weekend.

It's much worse than any of that.

I have to talk about this once and for all.

See... there's this series of commercials I can NOT stand.


OK, I know - most commercials are inherently stupid.

I know, I know... Many of them are overproduced products of the feverish imaginations belonging to ad creationists who apparently have been imprisoned in their windowless offices with feeding tubes shoved down their throats and catheters shoved up their dicks, where they are sponge-bathed and turned daily (to prevent bedsores) and condemned to endlessly create new ad campaign ideas about products and markets that they know nothing about (being that they are trapped in windowless offices with feeding tubes shoved down their throats and catheters shoved up their dicks).

So, yeah, I understand that's why most ads are so fucking stupid.

But one recently hovers above the rest as the king of stupidity in commercials.


In the grand scheme of things, it doesn't matter much at all - at least outside the huge Matrix-era condo complex which houses the millions of windowless offices with the ad creationists with feeding tubes shoved down their throats and catheters shoved up their dicks.

But I'll mention it (1) because I'd rather talk about that than any other bullshit going on and (2) I throw up a little in my mouth every time I see these comercials.


See, remember in the old days... ok, at least MY old days? Remember "plop plop fizz fizz Oh what a relief it is! Alka-Seltzer"?

Sometimes it was done in a jingo-like way:


Sometimes with a touch of class:


But you knew what it meant. Well, it meant a couple of things, but mainly it meant toss two tabs in water (plop plop), wait for them to effervesce (fizz fizz), drink, and soon you'll feel stomach relief coming on. (Incidentally, why swallowing large amounts of carbon dioxide actually makes your stomach feel better still eludes me, but it often really does work. Go figure.)

And so, the ad did it's job.

Plus you could play games with the product



On the other end of the commercial campaign spectrum is the thing which is the whole point of this pointless piece. It is what currently annoys me every time I forget to hit the 30-second skip on my TiVo.

The Geico Cavemen.

Horrible. Really.
Just awful.

And no one has told them to please STOP making more of them.

See... Fine, it started with a one-shot: "So easy a caveman can do it!" and – ha ha! – see, like there's actually cavemen alive and they've called to register a complaint. I got it. It was cute - maybe a little funny.



Once. It's funny once. Barely.

But can they let it rest? Nooooo… they have to make commercial after commercial with the constantly irritated cavemen. Here come those put-upon cavemen again, voicing their complaints on news-debate shows, in therapy, at a trendy party, in an airport terminal, and always pissed off because of Geico's "caveman" ad.



OK, here's my problem – well, four problems.

First - I just don't find it very funny. I have no problem with it. I'm not inherently worried about the plight of the caveman. I just think it's stale. Lame. Boooooooring. And that's ok, too. Until I think of the millions of dollars spent on these lame ads. Others may differ with me on this judgment, I'm sure. I don't care - it's a personal opinion.

Second - yes, I get that the cavemen are bitter at their lot. I totally get that. But, look, I don't know if it's the creepy prosthetics combined with the bitchy pissy queen attitude, but it skeeves me out. "I'm sorry, I don't have much of an appitite." prosthetic furry lips prissily pursed with shaggy head wagging in that "uh huh bitch bring it aaaawwwwnnn" look in his overly thick and furry forehead-framed eyes. Just, I dunno... disturbing.

Third - watching these commercials (which probably cost extra dollars with all the prosthetics, etc), I don't have a fucking clue what Geico is or what they do. Apparently something to do with cavemen? I really don't know.

Forth - and this is the worst – all I DO know, according to these ads, is the following:

Geico, we're a bunch of insensitive asswipes!

Is this what they're intending to convey? I mean, it's obviously not true – it's just a stupid running gag using a long-extinct species as a prop. And if it cost them a few hundred bucks to throw up these ads, I'd say it's no big deal. But thousands - MILLIONS of dollars?



And I guess that's my point – it's a stupid ad campaign AND it conveys exactly the wrong message. I'm no ad executive, but in my humble opinion, every advertisement for a company must, regardless of the actual ad content, convey the following message:

"COMPANY 'X': WE ARE AWESOME IN ALL WAYS!"

In contrast, having a running campaign that subtly says: "Company 'X': We are kinda scummy" just doesn't seem like a good idea.


And - GET THIS - these ads were deemed so good that... wait for it...

They're making a fucking TV sitcom about the fucking cavemen. This is not a joke.


Seriously, can *I* be an ad creationist? Pay me well, suck my piss up for me and wipe my ass, and I can sure make ad ideas as good as this!

Now, in all fairness to Geico, they also came up with this gem which still makes me chuckle


OK - that ends my critique of something unimportant because I can't deal with talking about important things.

Also, since I've shown my competence in ad development - anyone want to give me a job in the industry?

And here's a challenge: can anyone point me to a MORE annoying commercial campaign?

So yesterday, the House passage of the Matthew Shepard Act (an expansion of "hate crimes" legislation to include violent acts carried out due to a persons sexual orientation).

The President has vowed to veto it. I imagine his reasoning is gays are enemy number 3, right behind Iraqis and stem-cells, and so should be shot on sight. I really don't know this, of course. I can only extrapolate based on his past two vetos. However, I eagerly await the explanation when the veto occurs.

But in that context, I want to remind people of the other gay-related legal issue just introduced to the House: the introduction of the employment non-discrimination act (ENDA) to include sexual orientation as a reason that may not be used to deny employment or advancement.

I would think this would have even fewer opponents than the hate-crime laws, since, unlike hate-crimes, there is no pre-existing law against firing people in general. However, there ARE laws prohibiting non-hiring or firing a person because of their race, ethnicity, religion, and gender. So sexual orientation should be a clear follow-up with few arguments... if you don't want gays to drop dead.

But, of course, there will be just as many foes as there are against the Shepard act. I assume, again, that this is because there are people who simply hate gays and will even terrorize them in airports.

No doubt this bill will get vetoed as well, since if we deserve to be attacked and killed at will, we certainly deserved to be fired and denied employment.

Anyway, Barney Frank (the openly gay Rep. representing the 4th Congressional District of Massachusetts) dispels the usual myths around this proposal (h/t Joe.Me.God.):



I'll just summarize the main points.

• Tested principle in American Law: No discrimination based on something that has no bearing on the job in question.

• 16 states already have ENDA since as early as 1982.
• No negative effects or abuses in all those states.
  

• Claim: This is all a “deep dark plot” to make people “like some of us (gay people)”
• Fact:
• “Let me say at the outset that my indifference to whether a lot of these people think well of me or not can not be overestimated.”
• This bill confers no right to receive approval of who you are.
  
• Does confer the right to receive employment and promotion based SOLELY on capabilities and job performance.
  

• Claim: This is already the law – we don’t need this.
• Fact: It is NOT the law. Without a statute, there is NO protection from being fired for being gay, either in the public or private sector. (This was previously true for religion, ethnicity, sex, etc., until laws existed to address such abuses)
  

• Claim: This is an affirmative action statute
• Fact: The act “explicitly disavows affirmative action” – no quotas, no special programs.
  

Bottom line of Employment non-discrimination act:

"When you go to work, apply for a job, or are judged at the job, you are judged solely on your abilities and not on any prejudice."

Also, though he doesn't state it here: This law explicitly will NOT apply to Military or religious organizations, nor does it alter dress-codes a business might have.

Whether that's good or bad is a different debate, but it should shut up those claiming this is an effort to control churches or the military.

Will it work? Will it pass the veto threat? We'll see.

Sadly, there remain soul-less people in the world who can never get past their hate. Perhaps it's the only thing left in their lives that drives them. But, for whatever their reasons, it is people like that who will continue to make this an ongoing uphill battle.

But it's a battle worth fighting.

I wish I was in a position to contribute more.

Because I don't blog about work, this is kind of a non-sequitor.

Let me repeat that: I've never blogged about my work specifics or employers, etc. And I won't now, cause that's a potential ticket to goodbye-ville.

So... without any details... I have a sense that the position I'm in is on slightly shaky ground. (Not me in particular, I hasten to add! Just the general type of position I'm in.)

I could be wrong - but I've never had quite this feeling before.

I feel I must protect myself should I suddenly be unemployed, because it would be catastrophic for me. (Well, it would be for anyone, wouldn't it?)

So now I've rewritten my resume/cover, made it pseudo-public (no name/address) for the first time, and I'm sending out again, as well. My top two city choices are San Francisco and... yeah, Boston. (back on this list - I'll address that when I answer some questions GayProf sent me).

So, by being proactive, I hope to worry less about that particular part of my future.
But it's an awful feeling when you sense something being pulled out from under you.



Anyways... I haven't posted random youtube's in a while, so now's as good a time as any.


I like this for it's vibe and motto: Be who you are.




And this I like cause I never saw anything like this before!
The pictures represent people who've had an influence on his life (Both positive and, in some cases, negative). Pretty cool.
(Plus, the artist is cute. Straight, I think, but so what?)